Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize