wat bout pragnant strippers??
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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