Hey man sorry I got all grabby
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
