Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
