Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Green mimosas i think yes
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Randomize
