I wish I could punch you in the face.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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