im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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