Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
there was a trapeze. enough said
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize
