I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
i drank out of a bidet.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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