Already got asked if we're dating
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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