I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
