A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
a search helicopter?!
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Randomize
