The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
