I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
