So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
