tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
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