:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
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I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
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