Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
