i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
