I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
