At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
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