am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
So apparently I’m into choking now
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
