My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
