I only kidnapped one of them. chill
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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