So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Randomize
