He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize