Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
