hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Randomize
