wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Randomize