Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
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