This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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