I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
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