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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
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