you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
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