Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Man, jail baloney is awful.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
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