why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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