Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I need to sanitize my soul.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
