I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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