Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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