So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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