there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I am one with the molecules
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize