She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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