At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize