dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize