Too much gin, very little bucket
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I can't turn off my feet"
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
