this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
