It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize