@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
