Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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