yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Randomize
