I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Randomize
