David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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